So in the vein of Jack Nicholson’s famous rant, “…You can’t handle the truth!” I share the following:

“The cost of failure, successful people know from experience, is very modest compared to the cost of inaction. Failure means you are smarter the next time. Inaction means there is no next time. There is only a lifetime of unhappiness - first of worry and then of regret.” - Michael Masterson
Don’t make a life of regret. Take action.

I recently had an Aunt chide me for not having a “real job.” I suppose she meant working for someone else, but the reality is, I have 3 employees who depend on me not having a “real job.” For what it’s worth, my family can’t understand that I am actually really enjoying self employment - one of the perils of an academic and professional (i.e. lawyers and doctors) family.

So if you are considering a blast into your own entrepreneurial adventure, I whole-heartedly support you. Do make the proper preparations, but once you have, damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead! Get to it!

Want to read more of Masterson’s work? Try his ezine Early to Rise or one of his books on Amazon.

Small diversion today: So you really want to be a rock star? If you’re a musician or know one, you’ll want to check this out:

Rock Star Training

Did you know that eMarketer predicts music download sales will surpass CD sales by 2010? Does anyone actually purchase CDs now?? I haven’t seen one in at least 8 years….
If you know any musicians, or if you want to be a rock star, this info could be exactly what you need to launch a career in music.

Here’s a double opportunity:

1. You submit your video and get immediate circulation of 250,000 people - this is not a YouTube “no one will see you” site. It’s this guy’s blog and that’s how many hits he had last month.

2. He is teaching a course. You have a chance to win the course and if you do not win, purchase the course. But you are not at all obligated to do that - you still get great traffic and attention for your video - no purchase necessary! Course price is under $100.

Rock Star Training Site

If you think you can shake it better than Sanjaya, go post your video. If you do post a video, let me know and I’ll go check it out and maybe even vote for you. Can’t promise you’re going to have groupies by February, but if this is up your alley, why not?

Job Interview Etiquette tips for dressing with WSJ reader tips and a heavy hand from Miss Mentor.

1. Wear well made shoes, spend a bit more than you think you can afford. Women: closed toe and heel for women. Men: no tassels.

2. Suits: A fine suit will cost a little more. Do have it tailored. Gentlemen, choose a darker color though a tan suit can be appropriate. Opt for a blue shirt (not white) if tan suit is clearly appropriate. Ladies, avoid pastels and crimson. Choose a skirt suit over a pantsuit as a pantsuit inspires similar objections as men’s bow ties.

3. Make-up: no fake tans on either men or women. I stopped an interview once with a fellow who’s fake tan icked me out - his concern for appearing to be leisure class ultimately tipped him right out of contention. We have a serious work environment. The mentality of Fake Tanners is unacceptable. Being overly shiny: fake tan, high gloss lipstick, high polish fingernails, can send the message that you care about your appearance to the point of obsession. Look good, but let it be natural. Take out all visible piercings other than one in each ear lobe. Conceal obvious tattoos until you have the green light.

4. General: avoid fashion statements (unless interviewing with a fashion house in the design department - if in the Finance department, rules still apply), TURN OFF YOUR PHONE, discard your gum/mint/candy, roll your shoulders back and sit with pride. If you don’t know how to sit straight, go take a few Pilates classes and figure it out.

5. Your posture can seal your fate: stand and sit relaxed, strong, proud, but not boastful.

Last note: an ascot is not a tie. Ascots are much more informal than ties. Ascots are for hunting, lounging and other non-work activities. Bow ties are likewise not appropriate for interviews though can be appropriate in the office environment.

A personal note as an employer, interesting tattoos don’t bother me a bit, unless you are in certain forms of sales, but a fake tan sends me around the bend. There is nothing artful about a fake tan. It shows a lack of creativity on your part. If I want homogeneous employees, I’ll clone them myself. Same goes for “common” tattoos: butterfly or shamrock on the ankle, etc. The lame tattoos make it blindingly obvious that you have no creativity and are ultimately just as lame and insecure as the fake tan aficianados.

If you have a cool tattoo, keep it and tell me the story. Otherwise, get that thing zapped off before I see it.

YOU SPOKE! One of the clearest survey results that came was an interest in entrepreneurship. While I don’t believe one can teach another, “How to be an Entrepreneur,” I can share the interviews I have collected over the past few years and the information I use to refine my own approach. To that end, let’s start with a conversation about Angel Investing.

Angel Investors are the bridge between funding from your friends and family and the Venture Capital investors. Some Angel Investors will offer money for an equity stake while others will offer a loan that usually requires a smaller equity stake ultimately. For example, one deal I am considering right now (casual terms):

Choice A: I relinquish 20% of the equity for a 30% infusion, provide a preferred annual return of 10% and payback the original investment in 3 years. The 20% equity remains in the hands of the Angel Investors.

Choice B: The Angels receive 51% of the current equity today for an infusion of 30%, receive a 10% preferred annual return and principal payback over 3 years. As the principal is repaid, the equity stakes are reconfigured. Once all principal is repaid, the Angel Investors retain a 5% interest in the company with no preferred return - dividends only if we pay them.

That second one looks a little crazy, but this is an acquisition so the angels will be providing a guarantee on the bank note that covers the other 70% of the purchase price. Since the current owner is willing to finance the purchase and the company is very cash flow positive, I will probably do a multi-step Management Buyout instead. If you have other thoughts, please do share!

The point at which you consider seeking Angel Investors is when you are very serious about the growth of your company, you have studied thoroughly the capital needed to grow your company and you have exhausted your friends and family. For most, this is about the time you need $250,000 or more. It is also after you have developed the beta product/service to the point that you can show some kind of result.

If all you have is an idea, PLEASE, do not start pitching - save your energy, but do start meeting potential investors: angels and VCs. Get some proof of concept before you do any pitches. I prefer to see a customer list - people who have purchased or pre-purchased already. At the very least, a list of people willing to commit to a purchase when the product is done. If you can do that, you can sail through funding rounds.

Then again, if you are a serious Entrepreneur, you know that your number 1 task is to sell your product or service. Don’t wait to have sales staff or a sales force. Get out there and SELL!

Want a good, quick read from a serious Angel Investor? How to be an Entrepreneur - Angel Investors (this link takes you to another site). Who knew Twitter could be so useful! You can follow me on twitter: Miss Mentor .

Step 1: Consider your case.

What have you really done this past year? Did you drive more profit to the bottom line in a meaningful way? Did you suss-out a production inefficiency that has saved your company thousands/millions of dollars? Did you introduce your Boss or Boss’s boss to a premier customer with whom your company now does business? These are the kinds of things to consider. What have you REALLY done that goes beyond showing up for work sober. You DID show up for work sober, right?

Step 2: Begin to Prepare your case.

This is a finer comb activity. This is where years of experience playing chess may net you a nice bag-o-coin, but fret not, you navigate situations like this all the time. To wit, you navigate a freeway all the time (probably). This is just like that. On the freeway you have to avoid the crazy, angry drivers (my father) who cut you off/curse/slow/speed-up at whim, the half blind drivers (my grandfather, who is now no longer driving thankfully) who don’t mean to cause trouble, but can’t really comprehend (due to physical and visual limitations, not competence issues) moving at the speed of the rest of the traffic and aren’t really willing to try, and last but not least, the incompetent drivers - I don’t know what their motivations are, but avoid them. All this, plus you must move your body as quickly as possible to your destination safely. In some cases you dodge, others you may have to weave, but in all cases, you must keep going forward. Right?

Okay, so the destination is your raise/bonus. It is your responsibility to get everyone (all the drivers) to your destination. Which driver is your boss like? Who is in front of him? If your boss is an angry driver and his boss is a grandpa driver then you have a hot head stuck behind a slow poke. Yes? If you give the hot head room to maneuver around the slow poke, that will dissipate some of the angry driver’s energy and he’ll be kinder to you, the helpful driver.

This would be akin to you introducing your boss to a key customer that will give your boss a chance at a big promotion himself. Make sense? Since you’ve played the helpful driver, you can show your boss how you helped him meet “key customer” and that has opened up “door x” to “promotion y” for him. Do this subtly to avoid being tacky.

What if your boss is grandpa? Show him how you helped him stay safe by shielding him from the angry drivers. This would be along the lines of you taking on an extra assignment that his boss was throwing down the line of command; you working on and completing that job quickly, without need for supervision or direction from your boss so your boss’s boss is happy and your boss isn’t burdened with extra duties.

In essence, how have you worked WITH your boss (even if you think he’s a stinking rat fink) to make his/her life easier? Demonstrate that in your request for the raise. Do not expect your boss to remember every detail - to him, to her it was probably of very little consequence. Be succinct. Be clear. Tell the relevant details, get the memories going, make him feel good about how useful, helpful, productive you are and THEN ask for the raise.

Position yourself.

Step 3: Have a non-company mentor review your request.

Always put your request in writing so you can fully frame what you want to say and how you will say it, answer questions, respond to push-back. You may deliver orally, but be prepared in writing. Your boss may actually ask you to submit a paper request - sometimes as a stalling technique, sometimes for official documentation, sometimes just so she doesn’t forget you’ve made the request (me!). This request can be reviewed by your mentor for tactical opportunities, logic and relevance. If you have chosen a mentor in the same industry retired or with another company, she may know things about your company that can help you with your raise request (your Co. is about to win a big contract, your Co. President just lost 1/2 of this year’s earnings on a trip to Vegas, etc.). Do ask her to review your request.

Step 4: Practice, practice, practice.

Business is about presentation. We are constantly marketing ourselves, our product, our service, etc. just to keep the doors open. Embrace it. The better you do with fundamental activities, the higher you will rise. Practice how you will talk to your boss, your responses to questions, your tone of voice. Do it. Seriously. Make it natural. Confidence is earned through mastery of fundamentals - you cannot fake confidence.

If your boss sees you making a very natural request for a raise, he’s more inclined to give it to you.

Step 5: Go for it!

Ask your boss for a meeting time and then make your pitch. Be prepared. Good luck!

So your holiday bills are rolling in and you realize, dang, I need some cash, FAST! Maybe your boss will give you a bonus, right? Well probably not, if all you have to back you is your need. What have you done for your boss lately?

If you have been working diligently - making your boss’ life easier, then you have a fighting chance. However, if you’ve been goofing off or distracted, do not go ask for a raise! In most cases the, “It never hurts to ask,” mentality is good, but when it comes to getting your manager to part with a few pennies . . .

The logic is this: you have a finite number of opportunities each year to request an upgrade, i.e. a bonus. If you squander those opportunities, well, you are totally out-of-luck no matter how great you are. There is a certain seasonality to the process. February - just after the books for last year are closed and your boss knows if there’s some extra cash. July - as your boss budgets for the forthcoming year and enjoys the Northern hemisphere summer, and late-October as your boss’ College Football team is heading for a National Title (a few weeks later if NFL fans). Sure, it seems ridiculous, but there are generousity spikes at those times during the year. I studied and put that very information to use myself while running a not-for-profit years back, grew our donations 5000%, seriously. . . .

But here’s the catch. You have to have been extraordinarily productive in the months just prior to the request or your opportunity is null and void. You will be much less successful (i.e. fail) if you’ve been slacking off just prior to one of these “generousity inflection points,” GIPs. To maximize your GIP potential, work your tushie off for the 2+ months prior to the GIP. For the February GIP, make sure you work extra hard December and January. Got it?

Of course what I really advocate is working your tushie off, excelling beyond comprehension ALL THE TIME, but if you’re one of those folks who has to pace himself, well, use the GIP guide.

So what do you do if a GIP is not soon enough or you know you have to wait out this GIP? First, become very aware of what your boss needs so that she looks awesome to her boss. Second, do it, or at least help her do it. Find a way to insert yourself into your boss’ career path so she can’t help but appreciate you. Avoid passive-aggressive tendencies . . . if you are helping her, do it without expectation of gratification.. You are creating the foundation from which you will be able to approach her for more: money, time, responsibility later.

Go forth and be prosperous!

Office Etiquette - the office party . . . who you bring.

This may sound a bit prudish and perhaps even anal-retentive, but you really need to know this. Follow the office party invitation instructions precisely. That means, unless it states that guests are welcome . . . Guests are NOT welcome, even your spouse who knows everybody and is looking forward to seeing them.

There are many reasons the guest list may be limited and it really isn’t for you to figure out. Just play along nicely and no one gets hurt. Sure your spouse may get his feelings hurt, but you guys can always host your own party. This is an official company function and planning decisions have been made. Respect those decisions. The consequences for disrespecting the decision may not be immediately apparent, but you will no doubt leave an impression on the internal planner of the event - who may have more sway with upper management than you imagine.

It’s kind of like a wedding. Would you show up with a guest if you weren’t “and guest”ed on the invitation? (say no, please say no!!)

Exactly (you did say no, right??)

Few employees seem to grasp the importance of the Office Holiday Party. Of course you do . . . but those other employees…..

If the invitation states 7PM, get there before 7:30PM - even if you have to put your lipstick and mascara on once you arrive. Office parties really are an extension of your work environment. Punctuality is very important.

Let’s face it, if you’re not getting there on time during the week, well, you don’t have the fire in your belly to make much out of your career and I’m not really writing this column for you. For those of you who do get there on time during the week, keep up the good work and get to the office party on time.

FASHIONABLY LATE: In this context, fashionably late = 5-10 minutes late.

If you can not make it on time, and you have a very good reason, plan to stay late, particularly if you are a manager. It is up to you to socialize with your employees and your bosses. This is the one time of the year (for most firms) that you can genuinely dramatically expand your network within the company. This has obvious benefits for promotions within the firm and less obvious benefits for finding a better job down the road.

Office Party Etiquette - Eating

What you push into that lovely face of yours says more about you than you may appreciate. Now, don’t get all paranoid, but do consider the following:

For a cocktail hour/hors d’oeuvres:
1. Stick to the truly finger food items - occasionally a lousy caterer (or your bosses spouse in some cases) will serve psuedo finger food because he/she doesn’t know better - this includes items that take more than one bite to consume AND lose their structure (i.e. squish) as you take the first bite . . .  as well as fried items that may drip grease on you. Anything that can ooze on you WILL.
BEST TIP: stick to things that can be POLITELY consumed in one bite.

2. Beware the spicy/saucy/dairy items. If you have any tendency toward tummy rumbles, you should be old enough to be aware of what sets your tummy rumbling. For the sake of all concerned, please avoid those foods. 7 layer bean dip . . . jalapeno poppers . . . spicy wings . . .
3. Just shut up and eat it. If you have a real allergy - like peanuts cause death - then you know how to ask for food information tactfully and you may discard items that could kill you if you have picked them up in error. If on the other hand you simply do not like certain things, well you probably whine about it, stop. The Office Party is not the time, nor is it the place to whine . . . about anything. At a public event where you are being watched by the gatekeepers to your career, for heaven’s sake, just shut up and eat it. You picked up a spinach quesadilla with onions in it and you hate onions . . . well, never mind that that violates guideline #1 (single bite foods), just eat the damn thing. Onions aren’t going to kill you.

4. Feed yourself before you arrive - this is not a food trough. Every host/hostess appreciates guests enjoying their food, it is part of the joy of hosting. However, no one I know (except your Italian grandmother) appreciates you standing over the food table scarfing every morsel in sight. If you are really hungry, grab a bite to eat before you arrive so you won’t be tempted to position yourself at the food table.

5. When you pick up a food item, eat it quickly. No, I’m not advocating inhaling the item, but do be done with it. You never know when your Senior VP, Boss, Company President will walk up to have a conversation with you. With a drink in one hand and a meatball in the other, it is very difficult to shake hands. Women can get away with the pinky finger handshake, but men . . . if you ever give a pinky finger handshake - no matter what your *orientation* may be - you will be written off as weak. That and you just look stupid standing there with two hands full.

6. Keep your hands and mouth clean. After that meatball, make sure your hands are not sticky. Carry wet wipes with you if necessary. Again avoid the foods that will cause the most trouble - why anyone serves wings at a function is beyond me - they’re a mess!

7. Keep your drink in your left hand. In the US, we shake hands with our right hands. It is really best if that hand be dry and clean when you are greeting others. Drink napkins rarely provide enough absorption. Do you really want your boss to feel a sloppy wet, cold hand when you greet him? Drink your drink of choice, but understand that wine stems provide the best means for keeping your hands dry.

A very popular and loaded question is, “How much can I drink at the Office Party?”

Well, if you have to ask, you are probably accustomed to drinking too much - certainly too much for an office party.

Before I get flooded with e-mail retorts, YES, even if your work environment has a culture of excessive drinking - my past work environments certainly did - you still need to limit your alcohol consumption. Again, WOMEN, please take particular note, this is doubly important for you. Yes, it stinks, I agree.

Here’s the scoop: when you are out drinking with your office colleagues and you get *loaded* well, that’s bad, but workable within certain limits. When you get *loaded* at the office party, well, your boss’ sober husband is watching you - remembering every detail of that rant you gave under the influence, and as it turns out . . . he totally disagrees with your opinion on Jar, Jar/Britney/Fed Fund rate change/String Theory/whatever.

When you’re with your office buddies (presumably) you are all equally *loaded*. When you are at the office party, there may be some non-drinkers. So for the sake of your job and career, drinking responsibly takes on a whole new meaning. Indeed, though the booze may be “free” it’s effect on your career based on behavior at the office party can be quite costly.

Holiday Party Drinking Tips:

• Limit drinks with alcohol to a maximum of two.
• Avoid mixing drinks.
• Drink coffee, tea, soft drinks and water.

Ladies, again, this is doubly important for you. Sorry. Don’t fall prey to peer pressure to throw back a few extra to “prove” yourself to the team at the Office Party (or ever if you can avoid it). Type A personalities, LISTEN UP!

If you must, encourage your team to do something “manly” that will at least let you show strength. Take them to the gun range and fire off a few rounds (after you’ve practiced once or twice). Women metabolize alcohol a wee bit differently and generally weigh less than the men goading them into a drink-a-thon. Getting drunk only ever shows weakness - no matter how invincible you feel at the time. This being said by someone who puts down her fair share….

Party like a *sober* Rockstar. Onwards and upwards!